I was just watching scrubs which I recently started watching because Nicolle really enjoyed it and met Zack Braff so I thought I'd give it a watch and it made me realise if me and Nicolle get married which I realise is optimistic as we are only 17 I promise to give her the best wedding ever the dream princess wedding that I hope she's been dreaming of since a child and I hope I can be good enough to be her prince charming for than and ever more.
Monday, 19 May 2014
Saturday, 17 May 2014
The hill
today I noticed walking up Nicolle's hill, alone it takes half the time and half the effort the hill seems smaller and less of an incline, but when I walk up or down it alone I live in the past and for the future I don't think of the here and now and I do when I'm with Nicolle I don't worry about what's going to happen or what's happened I focus on what is going on that very second which is something I always promised myself id do when I was younger as it is supposedly the secret to happiness, this to me reaffirms why I need Nicolle she keeps me alive thinking of now not the next few years but the time I need to think about.
Wednesday, 7 May 2014
THE SNIFFLES!!!
Both Nicolle and I aren't feeling very well at the minute, its not a nice feeling its mainly a cold but we spent today for our few hours together listening and comparing some songs we enjoy. I just want to note them down here for a future present idea:
- Grey seal- Elton john (dixy chicks version)
- 5 seconds of summer- apparel underwear
- Jason Marz- I wont give up.
Once again I love my Nicolle
If you ever read this your perfect to me xxx
Wednesday, 23 April 2014
Just a note for today
I haven't said anything in a few days on here for no other reason than I am back to college and there's a lot of pressure on, everything is obviously perfect with Nicolle and right now I'm lay in bed alone and all I can think is I wish Nicolle was here so I will have to ask her to stay over again soon there's nothing more perfect than kissing her goodnight and waking up to her perfect face and the light beaming in her eyes. I miss her greatly right now and I love her, but shall see her tomorrow at some point.
If you read this Nicolle I love you.
If you read this Nicolle I love you.
Saturday, 19 April 2014
A promise for the future
So three days have passed an incredibly productive three days two dinners at my loves and tomorrow at mine for Easter, today we had dinner then watched Stephen Kings 'Carrie'.
Nicolle mentioned that 'girls are the worst' I assume this is because she relates to Carrie as a character which is sad but at the same time made me realise without the bullying me and Nicolle wouldn't be who we are today but together we can sure we are never venerable again, I love her and I will promise on here because I cant say it to her without sounding to really strange I will never let anyone hurt her, I really do adore her but I don't have much to say today.
Just I promise to always look after Nicolle.
Nicolle mentioned that 'girls are the worst' I assume this is because she relates to Carrie as a character which is sad but at the same time made me realise without the bullying me and Nicolle wouldn't be who we are today but together we can sure we are never venerable again, I love her and I will promise on here because I cant say it to her without sounding to really strange I will never let anyone hurt her, I really do adore her but I don't have much to say today.
Just I promise to always look after Nicolle.
Wednesday, 16 April 2014
I wont be sad its time we moved on.
Me and two of my 'closest' friends have argued the past couple of days about me deciding not to go uni and general bullshit, and I realised in two months non of this will matter we will have moved on with our lives. Its times like this I start to appreciate my family and Nicolle even more.
She has supported me through thick and thin and is talking to me even right now about what's going on, I honestly wouldn't know what to do without her. She is my Angel.
Other than the argument though its been a generally pretty perfect day, went to the doctors in the morning then came home and made some lunch which was amazing, she may not be much of a cook but Nicolle made a great salad and we had chicken to, I will train my sous chef up!!! :)
After that we watched the rest of captain America and then I introduced Nicolle to Bridget Jones diary, and while at the gym she watched edge of reason with my mum.
To finish the day I went and had my blood donated now this might not sound like the cherry on top of a wonderful cake but to me it wasn't time wasted it was time with the girl I loved, and every minute with her was perfect.
She is and will hopefully always be my best friend and companion and if you ever see this blog.
I Love you
Nicolle
xxx
She has supported me through thick and thin and is talking to me even right now about what's going on, I honestly wouldn't know what to do without her. She is my Angel.
Other than the argument though its been a generally pretty perfect day, went to the doctors in the morning then came home and made some lunch which was amazing, she may not be much of a cook but Nicolle made a great salad and we had chicken to, I will train my sous chef up!!! :)
After that we watched the rest of captain America and then I introduced Nicolle to Bridget Jones diary, and while at the gym she watched edge of reason with my mum.
To finish the day I went and had my blood donated now this might not sound like the cherry on top of a wonderful cake but to me it wasn't time wasted it was time with the girl I loved, and every minute with her was perfect.
She is and will hopefully always be my best friend and companion and if you ever see this blog.
I Love you
Nicolle
xxx
Tuesday, 15 April 2014
She likes superheros.
Since this a blog of things that I enjoy and love, one thing I just cant deny is I love superhero's I have so many superhero T-shirts and films its a little ridiculous and Nicolle likes Superhero's too!!!! this was almost a must for my true love and she likes them, this is probably the saddest post yet but its true its amazing!!!!
Our song and film.
This post is so I never forget, the first concert me and Nicolle went to together was a band named NeedToBreathe, the song more time instantly became ours, but since I'm a little obsessed with films we also have a film together called P.S I love you, these will forever be ours together.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cnGFGkP5Enw - Song
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CZzW6_hR068 - Film Trailer
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cnGFGkP5Enw - Song
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CZzW6_hR068 - Film Trailer
10 things that make her feel loved.
As it said in the last post rule 10 find out 10 things that make her feel loved and memorise it these are Nicolle's 10
1) Cuddles
2) My Kisses
3) My Warmth
4) Being Stroked (but obviously not quite like a dog)
5) Eye contact from me
6) Being told
7) Being held very close
8) Being as shoulder to cry on and knowing I'm here for her
9) Knowing I think about her at least once a day
10) Thinking she's making someone happy and getting to share those moments.
1) Cuddles
2) My Kisses
3) My Warmth
4) Being Stroked (but obviously not quite like a dog)
5) Eye contact from me
6) Being told
7) Being held very close
8) Being as shoulder to cry on and knowing I'm here for her
9) Knowing I think about her at least once a day
10) Thinking she's making someone happy and getting to share those moments.
Something I found today
These 20 rules I will always try to follow.
1) Never stop courting.
Never stop dating. NEVER EVER take that woman for granted. When you asked her to marry you, you promised to be that man that would OWN HER HEART and to fiercely protect it. This is the most important and sacred treasure you will ever be entrusted with. SHE CHOSE YOU. Never forget that, and NEVER GET LAZY in your love.
2) PROTECT YOUR OWN HEART.
Just as you committed to being the protector of her heart, you must guard your own with the same vigilance. Love yourself fully, love the world openly, but there is a special place in your heart where no one must enter except for your wife. Keep that space always ready to receive her and invite her in, and refuse to let anyone or anything else enter there.
3) FALL IN LOVE OVER and OVER and OVER again.
You will constantly change. You're not the same people you were when you got married, and in five years you will not be the same person you are today. Change will come, and in that you have to re-choose each other everyday. SHE DOESN'T HAVE TO STAY WITH YOU, and if you don't take care of her heart, she may give that heart to someone else or seal you out completely, and you may never be able to get it back. Always fight to win her love just as you did when you were courting her.
4) ALWAYS SEE THE BEST in her.
Focus only on what you love. What you focus on will expand. If you focus on what bugs you, all you will see is reasons to be bugged. If you focus on what you love, you can't help but be consumed by love. Focus to the point where you can no longer see anything but love, and you know without a doubt that you are the luckiest man on earth to be have this woman as your wife.
5) IT'S NOT YOUR JOB TO CHANGE OR FIX HER...
Your job is to love her as she is with no expectation of her ever changing. And if she changes, love what she becomes, whether it's what you wanted or not.
6) TAKE FULL ACCOUNTABILITY for your own emotions:
It's not your wife's job to make you happy, and she CAN'T make you sad. You are responsible for finding your own happiness, and through that your joy will spill over into your relationship and your love.
7) NEVER BLAME your wife If YOU get frustrated or angry at her, it is only because it is triggering something inside of YOU. They are YOUR emotions, and your responsibility. When you feel those feelings take time to get present and to look within and understand what it is inside of YOU that is asking to be healed. You were attracted to this woman because she was the person best suited to trigger all of your childhood wounds in the most painful way so that you could heal them... when you heal yourself, you will no longer be triggered by her, and you will wonder why you ever were.
8) Allow your woman to JUST BE.
When she's sad or upset, it's not your job to fix it, it's your job to HOLD HER and let her know it's ok. Let her know that you hear her, and that she's important and that you are that pillar on which she can always lean. The feminine spirit is about change and emotion and like a storm her emotions will roll in and out, and as you remain strong and unjudging she will trust you and open her soul to you... DON'T RUN-AWAY WHEN SHE'S UPSET. Stand present and strong and let her know you aren't going anywhere. Listen to what she is really saying behind the words and emotion.
9) BE SILLY...
Don't take yourself so damn seriously. Laugh. And make her laugh. Laughter makes everything else easier.
10) FILL HER SOUL EVERYDAY...
Learn her love languages and the specific ways that she feels important and validated and CHERISHED. Ask her to create a list of 10 THINGS that make her feel loved and memorize those things and make it a priority everyday to make her feel like a queen.
11) BE PRESENT.
Give her not only your time, but your focus, your attention and your soul. Do whatever it takes to clear your head so that when you are with her you are fully WITH HER. Treat her as you would your most valuable client. She is.
12) BE WILLING TO TAKE HER SEXUALLY...
To carry her away in the power of your masculine presence, to consume her and devour her with your strength, and to penetrate her to the deepest levels of her soul. Let her melt into her feminine softness as she knows she can trust you fully.
13) DON'T BE AN IDIOT...
And don't be afraid of being one either. You will make mistakes and so will she. Try not to make too big of mistakes, and learn from the ones you do make. You're not supposed to be perfect, just try to not be too stupid.
14) GIVE HER SPACE...
The woman is so good at giving and giving, and sometimes she will need to be reminded to take time to nurture herself. Sometimes she will need to fly from your branches to go and find what feeds her soul, and if you give her that space she will come back with new songs to sing... (okay, getting a little too poetic here, but you get the point. Tell her to take time for herself, ESPECIALLY after you have kids. She needs that space to renew and get re-centered, and to find herself after she gets lost in serving you, the kids and the world.)
15) BE VULNERABLE...
You don't have to have it all together. Be willing to share your fears and feelings, and quick to acknowledge your mistakes.
16) BE FULLY TRANSPARENT.
If you want to have trust you must be willing to share EVERYTHING... Especially those things you don't want to share. It takes courage to fully love, to fully open your heart and let her in when you don't know i she will like what she finds... Part of that courage is allowing her to love you completely, your darkness as well as your light. DROP THE MASK... If you feel like you need to wear a mask around her, and show up perfect all the time, you will never experience the full dimension of what love can be.
17) NEVER STOP GROWING TOGETHER...
The stagnant pond breeds malaria, the flowing stream is always fresh and cool. Atrophy is the natural process when you stop working a muscle, just as it is if you stop working on your relationship. Find common goals, dreams and visions to work towards.
18) DON'T WORRY ABOUT MONEY.
Money is a game, find ways to work together as a team to win it. It never helps when teammates fight. Figure out ways to leverage both persons strength to win.
19) FORGIVE IMMEDIATELY and focus on the future rather than carrying weight from the past. Don't let your history hold you hostage. Holding onto past mistakes that either you or she makes, is like a heavy anchor to your marriage and will hold you back. FORGIVENESS IS FREEDOM. Cut the anchor loose and always choose love.
20) ALWAYS CHOOSE LOVE. ALWAYS CHOOSE LOVE. ALWAYS CHOOSE LOVE.
In the end, this is the only advice you need. If this is the guiding principle through which all your choices is governed, there is nothing that will threaten the happiness of your marriage. Love will always endure.
1) Never stop courting.
Never stop dating. NEVER EVER take that woman for granted. When you asked her to marry you, you promised to be that man that would OWN HER HEART and to fiercely protect it. This is the most important and sacred treasure you will ever be entrusted with. SHE CHOSE YOU. Never forget that, and NEVER GET LAZY in your love.
2) PROTECT YOUR OWN HEART.
Just as you committed to being the protector of her heart, you must guard your own with the same vigilance. Love yourself fully, love the world openly, but there is a special place in your heart where no one must enter except for your wife. Keep that space always ready to receive her and invite her in, and refuse to let anyone or anything else enter there.
3) FALL IN LOVE OVER and OVER and OVER again.
You will constantly change. You're not the same people you were when you got married, and in five years you will not be the same person you are today. Change will come, and in that you have to re-choose each other everyday. SHE DOESN'T HAVE TO STAY WITH YOU, and if you don't take care of her heart, she may give that heart to someone else or seal you out completely, and you may never be able to get it back. Always fight to win her love just as you did when you were courting her.
4) ALWAYS SEE THE BEST in her.
Focus only on what you love. What you focus on will expand. If you focus on what bugs you, all you will see is reasons to be bugged. If you focus on what you love, you can't help but be consumed by love. Focus to the point where you can no longer see anything but love, and you know without a doubt that you are the luckiest man on earth to be have this woman as your wife.
5) IT'S NOT YOUR JOB TO CHANGE OR FIX HER...
Your job is to love her as she is with no expectation of her ever changing. And if she changes, love what she becomes, whether it's what you wanted or not.
6) TAKE FULL ACCOUNTABILITY for your own emotions:
It's not your wife's job to make you happy, and she CAN'T make you sad. You are responsible for finding your own happiness, and through that your joy will spill over into your relationship and your love.
7) NEVER BLAME your wife If YOU get frustrated or angry at her, it is only because it is triggering something inside of YOU. They are YOUR emotions, and your responsibility. When you feel those feelings take time to get present and to look within and understand what it is inside of YOU that is asking to be healed. You were attracted to this woman because she was the person best suited to trigger all of your childhood wounds in the most painful way so that you could heal them... when you heal yourself, you will no longer be triggered by her, and you will wonder why you ever were.
8) Allow your woman to JUST BE.
When she's sad or upset, it's not your job to fix it, it's your job to HOLD HER and let her know it's ok. Let her know that you hear her, and that she's important and that you are that pillar on which she can always lean. The feminine spirit is about change and emotion and like a storm her emotions will roll in and out, and as you remain strong and unjudging she will trust you and open her soul to you... DON'T RUN-AWAY WHEN SHE'S UPSET. Stand present and strong and let her know you aren't going anywhere. Listen to what she is really saying behind the words and emotion.
9) BE SILLY...
Don't take yourself so damn seriously. Laugh. And make her laugh. Laughter makes everything else easier.
10) FILL HER SOUL EVERYDAY...
Learn her love languages and the specific ways that she feels important and validated and CHERISHED. Ask her to create a list of 10 THINGS that make her feel loved and memorize those things and make it a priority everyday to make her feel like a queen.
11) BE PRESENT.
Give her not only your time, but your focus, your attention and your soul. Do whatever it takes to clear your head so that when you are with her you are fully WITH HER. Treat her as you would your most valuable client. She is.
12) BE WILLING TO TAKE HER SEXUALLY...
To carry her away in the power of your masculine presence, to consume her and devour her with your strength, and to penetrate her to the deepest levels of her soul. Let her melt into her feminine softness as she knows she can trust you fully.
13) DON'T BE AN IDIOT...
And don't be afraid of being one either. You will make mistakes and so will she. Try not to make too big of mistakes, and learn from the ones you do make. You're not supposed to be perfect, just try to not be too stupid.
14) GIVE HER SPACE...
The woman is so good at giving and giving, and sometimes she will need to be reminded to take time to nurture herself. Sometimes she will need to fly from your branches to go and find what feeds her soul, and if you give her that space she will come back with new songs to sing... (okay, getting a little too poetic here, but you get the point. Tell her to take time for herself, ESPECIALLY after you have kids. She needs that space to renew and get re-centered, and to find herself after she gets lost in serving you, the kids and the world.)
15) BE VULNERABLE...
You don't have to have it all together. Be willing to share your fears and feelings, and quick to acknowledge your mistakes.
16) BE FULLY TRANSPARENT.
If you want to have trust you must be willing to share EVERYTHING... Especially those things you don't want to share. It takes courage to fully love, to fully open your heart and let her in when you don't know i she will like what she finds... Part of that courage is allowing her to love you completely, your darkness as well as your light. DROP THE MASK... If you feel like you need to wear a mask around her, and show up perfect all the time, you will never experience the full dimension of what love can be.
17) NEVER STOP GROWING TOGETHER...
The stagnant pond breeds malaria, the flowing stream is always fresh and cool. Atrophy is the natural process when you stop working a muscle, just as it is if you stop working on your relationship. Find common goals, dreams and visions to work towards.
18) DON'T WORRY ABOUT MONEY.
Money is a game, find ways to work together as a team to win it. It never helps when teammates fight. Figure out ways to leverage both persons strength to win.
19) FORGIVE IMMEDIATELY and focus on the future rather than carrying weight from the past. Don't let your history hold you hostage. Holding onto past mistakes that either you or she makes, is like a heavy anchor to your marriage and will hold you back. FORGIVENESS IS FREEDOM. Cut the anchor loose and always choose love.
20) ALWAYS CHOOSE LOVE. ALWAYS CHOOSE LOVE. ALWAYS CHOOSE LOVE.
In the end, this is the only advice you need. If this is the guiding principle through which all your choices is governed, there is nothing that will threaten the happiness of your marriage. Love will always endure.
Our first meeting.
I cannot talk about every day that has passed in our relationship, but I can talk about when we first ever met up again before we started going out, we were both 15 and had been talking a while so arranged to meet up on the Sandhole (a local park) after school, during the day I got a text off a mutual friend who we both agree is like a Disney princess saying Nicolle was in a dress just for me.
This made me so much more nervous, I went home after school had a shower got changed and pretty much bathed in cologne for our first meeting, when walking to the park my heart was fluttering I felt sick with nerves but at the same time was far to excited, I hope Nicolle felt the same. When I got closer I saw her sat on a bench with friends, she claims because of nerves so she didn't back out. When I first lay eyes on her I knew I had fallen in love madly in love, she was perfect and still is to this day I count my lucky stars she's mine. When I got closer I still remember the smell Valentine 56 perfume, we where talking for a little while about absolute rubbish but I knew id ask her out, even down to the moment she said she had shoes that didn't match and all I could think is I'm hoping she didn't say me an her didn't match, I couldn't see anything wrong with her and what she was wearing.
anyway now I'm going on with myself, for quite a while after this first meeting we kept our dating a secret from her parents and got busted off mine after two dates, and I know if Nicolle ever sees this I'm in trouble but I feel the need to talk about our first kiss.
Our first kiss, was like no other it wasn't in a romantic place it wasn't a romantic kiss to be honest it was chaotic, but the chaos made it perfect to me.
I was her first real kiss she didn't know what to do, it was adorable and I still call her Pac-Man for it (you can guess why) but when I went in for the first kiss I also poked her in the eye perfect right (?) well to me it was I felt the earth spin a hundred miles an hour and looking in her eyes I knew it was right.
That is the last thing I have to say for now, I will be carrying on with post from today I just wished to share where it all began.
This made me so much more nervous, I went home after school had a shower got changed and pretty much bathed in cologne for our first meeting, when walking to the park my heart was fluttering I felt sick with nerves but at the same time was far to excited, I hope Nicolle felt the same. When I got closer I saw her sat on a bench with friends, she claims because of nerves so she didn't back out. When I first lay eyes on her I knew I had fallen in love madly in love, she was perfect and still is to this day I count my lucky stars she's mine. When I got closer I still remember the smell Valentine 56 perfume, we where talking for a little while about absolute rubbish but I knew id ask her out, even down to the moment she said she had shoes that didn't match and all I could think is I'm hoping she didn't say me an her didn't match, I couldn't see anything wrong with her and what she was wearing.
anyway now I'm going on with myself, for quite a while after this first meeting we kept our dating a secret from her parents and got busted off mine after two dates, and I know if Nicolle ever sees this I'm in trouble but I feel the need to talk about our first kiss.
Our first kiss, was like no other it wasn't in a romantic place it wasn't a romantic kiss to be honest it was chaotic, but the chaos made it perfect to me.
I was her first real kiss she didn't know what to do, it was adorable and I still call her Pac-Man for it (you can guess why) but when I went in for the first kiss I also poked her in the eye perfect right (?) well to me it was I felt the earth spin a hundred miles an hour and looking in her eyes I knew it was right.
That is the last thing I have to say for now, I will be carrying on with post from today I just wished to share where it all began.
Our story up to now.
This is the saddest most cringe worthy thing I have ever done but it has been an idea far to long; so this is the story of two people and there life, currently we are both 17 years old we have been together 2 years 19 days.
Here is our story up to now, Me an Nicolle met in primary school, in year 6 we were best friends and I first fell in love, I then asked her out..... three times and got rejected........ three times. So for some time I gave up we where just best friends well she was pretty much my only friend I was what most would call a loner or a loser.
During our time at primary school we used to ring each other every night we would talk for hours and hours, and on our last day of primary we all signed each others shirts, Nicolle signed mine 3 times, me and my other friend also threw a party for the end of school in our invitations I asked Nicolle out once more in a last ditch attempt, I didn't get a reply, I found out last year she kept that note all these years I'm not ashamed to admit I went home and cried in happiness it meant that much to her, and it was there I got my first picture of Nicolle a picture I kept for a long time.
We then went to different high schools in the same town but didn't really see each other much in the five years but every now and again we would talk but then lose touch again. This is the time I believed we needed to grow when I look back.
By a weird twist of fate in our last year of school I received a text one day of who I now call my love, it was this text where I grabbed the opportunity to meet her, This lead to our first meeting that will be my next post.
Here is our story up to now, Me an Nicolle met in primary school, in year 6 we were best friends and I first fell in love, I then asked her out..... three times and got rejected........ three times. So for some time I gave up we where just best friends well she was pretty much my only friend I was what most would call a loner or a loser.
During our time at primary school we used to ring each other every night we would talk for hours and hours, and on our last day of primary we all signed each others shirts, Nicolle signed mine 3 times, me and my other friend also threw a party for the end of school in our invitations I asked Nicolle out once more in a last ditch attempt, I didn't get a reply, I found out last year she kept that note all these years I'm not ashamed to admit I went home and cried in happiness it meant that much to her, and it was there I got my first picture of Nicolle a picture I kept for a long time.
We then went to different high schools in the same town but didn't really see each other much in the five years but every now and again we would talk but then lose touch again. This is the time I believed we needed to grow when I look back.
By a weird twist of fate in our last year of school I received a text one day of who I now call my love, it was this text where I grabbed the opportunity to meet her, This lead to our first meeting that will be my next post.
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